(Photo - Michael Caulfield - (c) WireImage)

Need I say more?

Other than I maybe should have had a bet.......

So it's Oscar time.....I would 'live blog' but I have to get up for work at 5am.....grrrrrr.

Here are my predictions......

Actor - Forest Whitaker in The Last King of Scotland.
Actress - Helen Mirren in The Queen (should be Judi Dench though!!)
Actor in a Supporting Role - Alan Arkin in Little Miss Sunshine.
Actress in a Supporting Role - Jennifer Hudson in Dreamgirls (but Abigail Breslin should win!).

Adapted screenplay - Patrick Marber for Notes on a Scandal.

Best Picture - a wide open field this year....it's a toss up between Babel and Little Miss Sunshine. For me....Little Miss Sunshine....I loved the film. I found Babel too 'worthy'.

and finally.....

Best Director - Martin Scorsese for the Departed. Come on! He lost in 1980 to Robert Redford and in 1990 to Kevin Costner for fucks sake. The Departed may not be his best film but there are still flashes of genius there......come on....you know it makes sense!

I wonder how many I'll get right......

As it is Lent, I have stupidly agreed to, in a rather public manner too, give up chocolate for 40 days (actually it is 46 as Sundays are not counted).

So, you can imagine my horror when I found 'rogue' Creme Egg in my room last night. I tried hiding it, unsuccessfully in my sock drawer, wardrobe and in a shoe. However, even when hidden from view it still taunted me......

At 3.30 this morning I found myself crushing the egg between to sheets of paper and throwing it in the bin. I woke up again at 3.42am and had a serious think about taking the crushed up mush and eating it.

This was all after only 24 hours of no chocolate. 45 days to go.......

Yesterday I went to the shops and bought.........

I am currently rather poor......but very very happy (and more mobile!!!)

Caught the end of the Brits last night....didn't watch the whole thing as there was something far more important happening on BBC 1 (missing 2 penalties too!).

Anyway.....is it me or did Liam Gallagher, whilst singing Cigarettes and Alcohol, sound just like Frank Sidebottom?

Back from my travels and quite frankly I am depressed.

Back to work tomorrow and I don't think I can face it. I could very well be out of a job in 6 weeks time and I am not sure what I am going to do.

I am hoping it will pass and that I avoid disappearing up my own arse as I did 18 months ago. Trouble is, i feel the same as I did, tearful, panicking, feeling of dread, that I am not good enough, feeling trapped....and the one I really find difficult to handle....feeling alone.

Am off to the big smoke tomorrow......for a Dave Gorman-esque meeting with my namesake (it's a very long story....I may tell it some time).

I'll also be going to the National Portrait Gallery, The V & A to see a Kylie exhibition and seeing if I can get tickets to this.

On Friday, I'm off to the 'toon for cake and a trip to the Arboreum in Durham.

I think I'm going to like not being at work :)

If you have a spare £6 this weekend, go and see 'Notes on a Scandal'. It's a fine film, bloody well written and Judi Dench gives a performance of evil twisted genius.

For some reason I downloaded Lame....sorry....Limewire, it was more out of curiosity as a number of people have described it as the 'saviour of the internet'. No....it's basically KaZaA.

Anyway, it was all because I had an earworm, 'Dragging Me Down' by the Inspiral Carpets, been humming it all day. I couldn't find it from my usual *cough* sources so gave Limewire a whirl.

I ended up taking a trip down memory lane....no sooner had I listened to the Carpets, I was listening to Hippy Chick by Soho, Hear the Drummer Get Wicked by Chad Jackson, Don't Be Cruel by Bobby Brown, Wash Your Face In My Sink by the Dream Warriors, Pink Sunshine by Fuzzbox and Requiem by the London Boys.......ah my teenage years. My god the music was crap.

Oh dear......time to man the barracades....

http://www.nuj.org.uk/

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/6314701.stm

At 9.04pm.....a miracle happened.

The internet hamsters came back from lunch and made the interweb work again.

Thank you very much Mr Hamsters, I am now the proud owner of 2 tickets to see Pearl Jam at Wembley Arena on June the 18th.

3 hours and 2 minutes.......no tickets.....still.....

Ferkin' interweb.

It is turning into a saga.......

After trying for 1hr and 18 minutes I am still ticketless.

3 times I have managed to get the sodding tickets in my basket........and each time the secure server has died and not taken payment.

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr *kicks bin*.

Stuff getting cross about 'Jesus Camp'.....it's time to get excited. Pearl Jam are on tour again this year and will be in London on June the 18th.

It's a fan club only gig at Wembley Arena.

Bloody good luck I'm in the fan club then! Hurrah and huzzar :)

I am currently watching one of the most scariest things I have ever seen.........no it's not The Hills Have Eyes or The Last House on the Left.

The most horrific film ever made is this......

It's a documentary called 'Jesus Camp'. It's about a summer camp aimed at training children to be evangelists. In fact in the first few minutes the children are asked to 'save their lost friends'.

I have been watching it for 8 minutes and was so cross that I had to take a screen grab and blog about it.

Let hope I calm down for the rest of it!

In a fit of stupidity, not only have I managed to dev and scan in the film I took yesterday of a visit to Louth but I'm actually managing to blog.......hurrah!

It's only 'cos I'm a member of the newly formed 'Hull Bloggers' which is rather cool. We should have a blog meet.....but that could be quite scary.

Anyway, here is one of my new pictures........

You can see the rest here if you fancy.

Celebrity-itis

So I switch on my telly at 8.30pm this evening to find that on 3 of the 5 terrestrial channels are showing 'celebrity' based programmes.

BBC1 - Just the Two of Us - 'celebrities' paired with has-been singers who murder, sorry, duet together on well known songs, eventually voted off by the public.

ITV - Soapstar Superstar - Current and Former soapstars sing and are voted off by the public.
CH4 - Celebrity Big Brother - they live in a house, being 'normal', the public watch and vote them out.

Excuse me.....but what the FUCK is going on?

No, I do not wish to listen to/see over-the-hill celebrities singing songs, going to the toilet, singing more bloody songs, chopping carrots, bitching and moaning.

I would like proper programmes, ones with actors in (who don't feel the need to sing or complain about being famous), a well written drama or a documentary, something to make you think.

I would like to vote off all the 'celebrities' involved in the three shows, the production companies that make them and the moronic press who give them far too much publicity.......and throw them into a big pit filled with petrol and light a match.......and laugh as they all burn in hell.....

Or I could switch my telly off and read a book instead.

Live Celebrity Big Brother Blogging

This is the uncorrected version....if there are spelling errors, I do apologise.



Celebrity BB starts tonight......Oooooo....another fornight of shit telly then. The line-up is currently secret so I thought I'd do something a little different and do some live blogging as the 'celebrities' enter the house......

8.07pm.....Switch over to channel 4 seven minutes late.....bit of an onimous start. Davina is waffling as she goes round the house. The seats in the garden are heated. Big Wow.

8.08pm......Davina needs an autocue.....

8.09pm First advert break....advertising BB8 auditions *sigh*. Expedia don't make travel easier, they make it more expensive. Neurogena, black head stuff with the bird from Smallville, the words of Bill Hicks echo round my brain. X Box 360, Comet, Soya Milk, Carphone Warehouse....Smokin' Aces trailer (which spoils the film totally).....Blue WKD.....Tesco.....Expedia January Sale.....Ugly Betty (good series.....)

8.14......Back from advert hell......

8.15......*cough* the first celebrity is Jermaine Jackson aka Muhammad Abdul Aziz (Don't forget he's a Muslim convert folks.......oh and also Michael Jackson's brother).He's a clean freak and hates dirt. I dare someone to poo in his bed. He says he's a private person.....so why go into the house then?

8.19.....Jermaine Jackson enters the house dressed like his brother Michael....spooky....

8.20.....Celebrity number 2 is Danielle somebody....ex Miss Great Britain....title taken from her due to her realationship with Teddy Sheringham who was one of the judges (she says that they hooked up after the competition). In the words on BB7 contest Nikki......'Who is she?! Who is she?!.....Greeted with boo's from the crowd.....ha ha ha. Appears to be wearing a cow.

8.24....Who could celebrity number 3 be? I can hardly wait.....well actually I could but anyway....it's.................H from Steps? Cilla Black? Fucking hell, it's Ken Russell!!!!!! *faints* Well done CH4, that is a total curve ball. He is mucho bananas and should be quite fun in the house. Oh dear, he's singing 'Singin' in the Rain' badly......he is nuts :) Bloody hell he's 80....and they've had to cut the sound as he's swearing......ha ha ha. Wanders into the house.....he's the only one to introduce himself to the others. Bless.

8.33...More adverts.....time for a cup of tea.

8.37......Adverts over....hurrah....it's getting as bad as American telly.....so celebrity number 4 is.......Jo Meara from S Club 7. Oh sweet jesus. Complaining about being in a boy/girl band. Hello?! You travelled the world....you've seen things I'll never see.....get your head out of your arse and be thankful!! Miserable cow......she clearly wants to cling onto any sliver of 'celebrity' status.....i would have picked dignity myself. Enters the house and says she's scared. Wimp.

8.42.....No 5.....Yay!!! Leo Sayer, hurrah.....I want him to win already. He's doing the show because he's got nowt else to do. Bless. He knows Jermaine Jackson.

8.46.....No idea who is going to be next....the papers have been quite wrong so far.....oh OK...more bloody adverts!

8.47....Why is Brian Cox doing voice-overs for Pizza Hut adverts? As if being in a Steven Seagal isn't bad enough.....

8.52....Back again.....media tart, sorry, celebrity number 6 is......some Bollywood actress. I'm probably being rather dismissive as she'll be a massive celebrity everywhere else in the world. Reported in the press that she's getting £300 000 to appear. Not bad for a maximum of 2 weeks work.

8.56....I think they will up the stakes again and throw another curve ball....someone controversial....need someone else like Ken Russell.

8.58......Carol Malone.....newpaper columnist...rent-a-gob....famous for slagging off reality TV contestants. Mmmmmm.

9.03.....Number 8 is....Donny Tourette....famous for shagging Peaches Geldof. He'll be on to get his 'band' some exposure. Nuff said. Crowd chants 'Who are ya'....doesn't take too kindly to it. Knows Leo Sayer!!!!!

9.08....Guess what.....yup...adverts....

9.13....Only 5 minutes of adverts the.....*yawn*.....the 9th celebrity *cough* is H from Steps. Is that a barrel i can hear being scraped? Oh and he's gay.....who'd have thunk it.....

9.17....Cleo Roccos....remember her from the Kenny Everett show? Thought not. Anyway, she's number 10.

9.21....Jesus...is this nearly over yet? No Jade Goody yet....thankfully.

9.22....Dirk Benedict!!! My hero.....well....I was 8 at the time. Ladies man. I hope he wins already. Sorry Leo :) They made him arrive in an A-Team style van. Has no idea what he's doing there.

9.27.....Zzzzzzzzzzzz.......oooo a family arrives on Friday.....I wonder who that could be?

9.30.....Finally it's all over. It was tedious.....I won't be watching. Well maybe a little.......

Well, that's another one over with :)

In the end it was a quiet Christmas Day, just me, mum, step-dad, my sister and her boyfriend. We all ate too much as usual but there was the minimum of fuss.

I still find the festive period quite difficult, with my Dad living so far away and my former step mother denying access visits to our half brothers. Not even a card this year........ I'll stop there before I get too cross or cry. I may blog about it at another time.......

The gift haul was impressive this year. I got a soft modded X-Box which is fab so I can play *cough* DL'd games and DVD's with no fuss. I fear that my social life will be over though......the controller extends far enough for me to play Project Gotham Racing 2 from the comfort of my bed. I also got a Spencer Tracy/Katharine Hepburn DVD boxset, a new winter coat, a lovely print of photo from a trip to the Lakes in the summer, a Hello Kitty t-shirt (yes, I am a big kid) and Hannibal Rising in hardback.

I read Hannibal Rising in 6 hours. It is.....................dreadful. A massive disappointment. Lecter should have remained an enigma.......I also think the reasons behind him becoming a serial killer are lame. Why do we need to justify his actions? Can't he just be evil....or do we need an answer in order to make us feel better? If you want to read a book that really gets into the mind of a serial killer than find a copy of Silent Terror - Killer on the Road by James Ellroy. It's a truly terrifying read.

It's nearly Christmas! Hurrah!

13 days (my maths maybe wrong) and it'll all be over and I won't have to hear Wizzard singing that bloody song again, or Slade or Paul McCartney for the matter.

Yes, I am not a big fan of Christmas, in fact I am beginning to hate it. Not the present giving and christmas dinner eating, it's everything else. The office party, queuing, crap telly, queuing, christmas card writing, queuing, silly santa hat wearing and bloody queuing.

Why do people do that whole thing of standing in the doorway when you are trying to get into a shop....and why do they tut at you when you try to get past? Why are all supermarkets full of people buying enough food to last 3 weeks rather than 2 days? Can we really not cope with all shops being closed for one day? What is it with people wearing Santa hats? No, I will not smile and be bloody festive!

The one phrase I do not what to hear said to me at all is 'Cheer up, it's Christmas'......I maybe force to stab someone if I do.

Now, if you'll excuse me I have some presents to wrap.

PS - I work for a bunch of tossers - I'll will tell all tomorrow (otherwise I'll get worked up, go grrrrrr and not get to sleep for hours)

I've been away and just come back. I went to Newcastle. It was ace. I spent some time with a lovely friend, ate cheese, went see the Spanking the Monkey exhibition at the Baltic, finally saw the Angel of the North (after dodging 4 lanes of traffic), ate even more cheese, drank cherry beer, watched a puppet show and went to look for vampire rabbits.

I was the perfect tonic, work is very stressful and if I hadn't have got away I think I would have gone bonkers.

PS - The Killers were crap....not the band but the sound. Hull Arena should not be used as a music venue....ever. Have you ever noticed that no band ever plays there twice.........

PPS - I passed my driving test on Friday.....hurrah.