Oh dear......time to man the barracades....

http://www.nuj.org.uk/

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/6314701.stm

At 9.04pm.....a miracle happened.

The internet hamsters came back from lunch and made the interweb work again.

Thank you very much Mr Hamsters, I am now the proud owner of 2 tickets to see Pearl Jam at Wembley Arena on June the 18th.

3 hours and 2 minutes.......no tickets.....still.....

Ferkin' interweb.

It is turning into a saga.......

After trying for 1hr and 18 minutes I am still ticketless.

3 times I have managed to get the sodding tickets in my basket........and each time the secure server has died and not taken payment.

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr *kicks bin*.

Stuff getting cross about 'Jesus Camp'.....it's time to get excited. Pearl Jam are on tour again this year and will be in London on June the 18th.

It's a fan club only gig at Wembley Arena.

Bloody good luck I'm in the fan club then! Hurrah and huzzar :)

I am currently watching one of the most scariest things I have ever seen.........no it's not The Hills Have Eyes or The Last House on the Left.

The most horrific film ever made is this......

It's a documentary called 'Jesus Camp'. It's about a summer camp aimed at training children to be evangelists. In fact in the first few minutes the children are asked to 'save their lost friends'.

I have been watching it for 8 minutes and was so cross that I had to take a screen grab and blog about it.

Let hope I calm down for the rest of it!

In a fit of stupidity, not only have I managed to dev and scan in the film I took yesterday of a visit to Louth but I'm actually managing to blog.......hurrah!

It's only 'cos I'm a member of the newly formed 'Hull Bloggers' which is rather cool. We should have a blog meet.....but that could be quite scary.

Anyway, here is one of my new pictures........

You can see the rest here if you fancy.

Celebrity-itis

So I switch on my telly at 8.30pm this evening to find that on 3 of the 5 terrestrial channels are showing 'celebrity' based programmes.

BBC1 - Just the Two of Us - 'celebrities' paired with has-been singers who murder, sorry, duet together on well known songs, eventually voted off by the public.

ITV - Soapstar Superstar - Current and Former soapstars sing and are voted off by the public.
CH4 - Celebrity Big Brother - they live in a house, being 'normal', the public watch and vote them out.

Excuse me.....but what the FUCK is going on?

No, I do not wish to listen to/see over-the-hill celebrities singing songs, going to the toilet, singing more bloody songs, chopping carrots, bitching and moaning.

I would like proper programmes, ones with actors in (who don't feel the need to sing or complain about being famous), a well written drama or a documentary, something to make you think.

I would like to vote off all the 'celebrities' involved in the three shows, the production companies that make them and the moronic press who give them far too much publicity.......and throw them into a big pit filled with petrol and light a match.......and laugh as they all burn in hell.....

Or I could switch my telly off and read a book instead.

Live Celebrity Big Brother Blogging

This is the uncorrected version....if there are spelling errors, I do apologise.



Celebrity BB starts tonight......Oooooo....another fornight of shit telly then. The line-up is currently secret so I thought I'd do something a little different and do some live blogging as the 'celebrities' enter the house......

8.07pm.....Switch over to channel 4 seven minutes late.....bit of an onimous start. Davina is waffling as she goes round the house. The seats in the garden are heated. Big Wow.

8.08pm......Davina needs an autocue.....

8.09pm First advert break....advertising BB8 auditions *sigh*. Expedia don't make travel easier, they make it more expensive. Neurogena, black head stuff with the bird from Smallville, the words of Bill Hicks echo round my brain. X Box 360, Comet, Soya Milk, Carphone Warehouse....Smokin' Aces trailer (which spoils the film totally).....Blue WKD.....Tesco.....Expedia January Sale.....Ugly Betty (good series.....)

8.14......Back from advert hell......

8.15......*cough* the first celebrity is Jermaine Jackson aka Muhammad Abdul Aziz (Don't forget he's a Muslim convert folks.......oh and also Michael Jackson's brother).He's a clean freak and hates dirt. I dare someone to poo in his bed. He says he's a private person.....so why go into the house then?

8.19.....Jermaine Jackson enters the house dressed like his brother Michael....spooky....

8.20.....Celebrity number 2 is Danielle somebody....ex Miss Great Britain....title taken from her due to her realationship with Teddy Sheringham who was one of the judges (she says that they hooked up after the competition). In the words on BB7 contest Nikki......'Who is she?! Who is she?!.....Greeted with boo's from the crowd.....ha ha ha. Appears to be wearing a cow.

8.24....Who could celebrity number 3 be? I can hardly wait.....well actually I could but anyway....it's.................H from Steps? Cilla Black? Fucking hell, it's Ken Russell!!!!!! *faints* Well done CH4, that is a total curve ball. He is mucho bananas and should be quite fun in the house. Oh dear, he's singing 'Singin' in the Rain' badly......he is nuts :) Bloody hell he's 80....and they've had to cut the sound as he's swearing......ha ha ha. Wanders into the house.....he's the only one to introduce himself to the others. Bless.

8.33...More adverts.....time for a cup of tea.

8.37......Adverts over....hurrah....it's getting as bad as American telly.....so celebrity number 4 is.......Jo Meara from S Club 7. Oh sweet jesus. Complaining about being in a boy/girl band. Hello?! You travelled the world....you've seen things I'll never see.....get your head out of your arse and be thankful!! Miserable cow......she clearly wants to cling onto any sliver of 'celebrity' status.....i would have picked dignity myself. Enters the house and says she's scared. Wimp.

8.42.....No 5.....Yay!!! Leo Sayer, hurrah.....I want him to win already. He's doing the show because he's got nowt else to do. Bless. He knows Jermaine Jackson.

8.46.....No idea who is going to be next....the papers have been quite wrong so far.....oh OK...more bloody adverts!

8.47....Why is Brian Cox doing voice-overs for Pizza Hut adverts? As if being in a Steven Seagal isn't bad enough.....

8.52....Back again.....media tart, sorry, celebrity number 6 is......some Bollywood actress. I'm probably being rather dismissive as she'll be a massive celebrity everywhere else in the world. Reported in the press that she's getting £300 000 to appear. Not bad for a maximum of 2 weeks work.

8.56....I think they will up the stakes again and throw another curve ball....someone controversial....need someone else like Ken Russell.

8.58......Carol Malone.....newpaper columnist...rent-a-gob....famous for slagging off reality TV contestants. Mmmmmm.

9.03.....Number 8 is....Donny Tourette....famous for shagging Peaches Geldof. He'll be on to get his 'band' some exposure. Nuff said. Crowd chants 'Who are ya'....doesn't take too kindly to it. Knows Leo Sayer!!!!!

9.08....Guess what.....yup...adverts....

9.13....Only 5 minutes of adverts the.....*yawn*.....the 9th celebrity *cough* is H from Steps. Is that a barrel i can hear being scraped? Oh and he's gay.....who'd have thunk it.....

9.17....Cleo Roccos....remember her from the Kenny Everett show? Thought not. Anyway, she's number 10.

9.21....Jesus...is this nearly over yet? No Jade Goody yet....thankfully.

9.22....Dirk Benedict!!! My hero.....well....I was 8 at the time. Ladies man. I hope he wins already. Sorry Leo :) They made him arrive in an A-Team style van. Has no idea what he's doing there.

9.27.....Zzzzzzzzzzzz.......oooo a family arrives on Friday.....I wonder who that could be?

9.30.....Finally it's all over. It was tedious.....I won't be watching. Well maybe a little.......